The Freethought Mom

This will clarify it

2006-04-06T23:50:00.000-04:00

How Did Jesus Walk On Water?

Jesus did a lot of miracles. We don't know how he did them. Jesus is God, so he can do anything. Walking on the water was not Jesus' ordinary way of getting around. He did this miracle, like other miracles, to teach his disciples and to show them his power. Jesus is Lord of the laws or the universe - he's in charge of the water, too, so he can walk on it whenever he wants to.

Doesn't this just make you want to go back to Sunday school again?

tags: religion, atheism, jesus

2006-04-06T23:18:00.000-04:00

Elvis certainly didn't mean that the Pope would wear his red shoes, somehow I missed the fact that Ratzinger wears red Prada shoes and other sundry, like Gucci sunglasses, that people have donated to him. Wow, doesn't this make him seem like a practical kind of guy, I mean, since you can't take it with you, right? As this anonymous article states:

Do you know how rude it would be for a man of the cloth, the highest authority in all of Christianity, to say, “no thank you, but it wouldn't look good [gifts] because there are so many starving people in the world”? The Pope is in no position to live simply. And thus, he wears these expensive items, which close to 99.9 percent of his
followers can not afford, to remind himself that rich people are God's children too.

So my burning question is, who the heck would donate expensive shoes to the pope? Are they trying to curry favors with their god, or to get better seats at Mass?

In other news, I recently received my copy of the End of Faith AND amphimacer emailed me a link to the Atheist Manifesto on the same day. Coincidence OR NOT??!! :)

tags: religion, atheism, pope, , Sam Harris

Thoughts on the Soul

2006-04-04T21:11:00.000-04:00

marcguyver asks: "What do you think happens when you die and do we possess anything 'eternal' in our body, i.e. a soul? ... I am hoping and believing that this is not the end."

I mulled this question for a few days (then I disappeared into my busy life, sorry).

I grew up being told something very interesting. 'I am special because I have an eternal soul. I can look forward being reunited with loved ones and lasting forever in a very special place (as long as I eat my peas and do what I'm told).' Doesn't this, on the surface at least, seem like a lovely, positive thing that anyone would love?

In college, even though I had long left behind the Catholic church's dogma, I searched for the soul. I read widely, from Buddism to new agey stuff. Shouldn't there to be something to "a life after death" as it seems to be such a common theme across many cultures? Great question.

Part One: do you really want to live forever?

Would living forever really be such a good thing? Books such as Lord of the Rings and Interview with a Vampire do not make me look forward to joining some eternal place. These books are by two theists, Tolkien & Rice is famously a newly reconverted theist. stardust1954 pointed out Twain's Letters from the Earth, a hilarious non-theist take on the question.

But... if you love science fiction at all, try one of my favorites: Hyperion, but trust me on this, if you don't buy book #2 you will regret it. (It does contain some pretty explicit sex scenes, so I'm not sure you'll want to share it with a young teen.) Did I remember to tell you to get #2 if you do pick it up? You'll never wish Heaven on anyone after reading these two books.

I have more thoughts, on the mechanics of the soul, RSN.

tags: religion, atheism, soul

Spring must be bunny time

2006-04-03T13:20:00.000-04:00

Does Britney Spears help influence the first time your child has sex? Reuters reports on a study in the current issue of Pediatrics "Sexy Media Matter: Exposure to Sexual Content in Music, Movies, Television, and Magazines Predicts Black and White Adolescents' Sexual Behavior", finding that more exposure to "sexy" media means earlier they are doin' it. An excerpt from the yahoo news story:

The teenage pregnancy rate in the United States is three to 10 times higher than that found in other industrialized nations, making that and exposure to sexually transmitted infections a major public health concern, the study said.

At the same time parents tend not to talk about sex with their children in a timely and comprehensive way, leaving a vacuum in which the media may become a powerful sex educator, providing "frequent and compelling portraits of sex as fun and risk free."

"Interestingly one of the strongest predictors of risk for early sexual intercourse for both black and white teens (in the study) was the perception that his or her peers were having sex," the report said.

I'm bringing up my children a "bit" differently from how I was brought up, and this is one huge difference. My dad to this day, my mother jokes, can't bring himself to face the fact that his older sister has ever had sex, much less his daughters.

Our kids are at risk due to religions peddling the sex is bad meme, and its backlash, our culture's obsession with strange teenage-boy fantasy worlds. How does one navigate the waters, with abstinence-only programs failing (unless you think gonorrhea of the throat is a good outcome), while girls are becoming fertile earlier every year?

But, instead of feeling like a unmoored boat bobbing in the waves when it comes to teaching my child about sex, there are good books such as Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids to Know About Sex, but Were Afraid They'd Ask: The Secrets to Surviving Your Child's Sexual Development from Birth to the Teens to guide the way. Another book I have is the Yellow Dyno book, which gave me the courage to start using the p-word (penis). I can now say it without blushing, a huge step away from my Catholic upbringing. If you can't even say the word, how do you give your children the skills they need to protect themselves against predators?

tags: religion, atheism, sex

Back, I hope

2006-03-30T20:38:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry I've been away, my two faithful readers (one??) ...I have no time to blog, but yet I am drawn back here... because I love to write and when do I take the time to do something I love? I think I stopped in part because my "perfectionist" tendencies take over: if I can't write what I think might be an interesting piece, I'd rather not write at all. I'll try to relax and just write less often rather than giving up wholesale, promise.

There's been a slew of interesting news stories, like the study of heart patients being prayed over (guess what happens?), science finding that 666 isn't the number of the beast (try 616), and how Douglas Adams must be turning over in his grave (42 is an important number indeed).

I had a surprise when I took beliefnet's "What's Your Spiritual Type?" quiz [to see what kind of site I was linking to above]. It's got some good questions, like

Q 20. In regards to religion and morality:

1. I think it's impossible to be moral without being religious
2. It's possible but difficult to be moral without reminders from religion
3. It's entirely possible to develop and live by a good moral code without religion
4. Religion makes it harder to be a moral person

If you think I picked answer #4, you'd be correct. The surprise was that I tested 32 out of a range of 25-100: "Spiritual Dabbler: Open to spiritual matters but far from impressed" instead of the lower-scoring "Hardcore Skeptic". How silly is that :)

Some humor is required

2006-03-13T17:23:00.000-05:00

I've been working on two "crisis" situations and another project right now, so I have only time to repost from Randy Cassingham's jumbojoke. Thanks for all the great comments & email ... sorry for not having much time lately, back soon...

A Lesson from Jesus

Jesus saw a crowd chasing down a woman to stone her and approached them. "What's going on here, anyway?" He asked.

"This woman was found committing adultery and the law says we should stone her!" one of the crowd responded.

"Wait," yelled Jesus, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."

Suddenly, a stone was thrown from out of the sky, and knocked the woman on the side of her head.

"Aw, c'mon, Dad!" Jesus cried, "I'm trying to make a point here!"

Evangelical, Fundamentalist, what's the diff?

2006-03-09T20:40:00.000-05:00

stardust1954 recently posted a link to the PBS show The Jesus Factor. A page inside there is titled Evangelicals v. Fundamentalists. Yikes! I thought they were the same thing! The second interview down, by John Green, says that the fundamentalist subset of evangelicalism are the ones that take the bible literally instead of metaphorically. Given this difference, I suspect if I review my writings, I interchange these terms. Sorry.

Does my simplistic cheat-sheet capture the differences?

Catholic: bible + Catechism + pope
Evangelical: only use the bible
Fundamentalist: the bible is inerrant

tags: religion, atheism, bible

Bart Ehrman: Misquoting Jesus

2006-03-09T13:36:00.000-05:00

Misquoting Jesus: : The Story Behind Who Changed the Bible and Why by Bart Ehrman is a relatively new book. I pulled out an excerpt from a Washington Post article (thanks Lya!) relevant to recent discussions on here:

For the next 12 years, he studied at Moody, at Wheaton College (another Christian institution in Illinois) and finally at Princeton Theological Seminary. He found he had a gift for languages. His specialty was the ancient texts that tried to explain what actually happened to Jesus Christ, and how the world's largest religion grew into being after his execution.
What he found there began to frighten him.
The Bible simply wasn't error-free. The mistakes grew exponentially as he traced translations through the centuries. There are some 5,700 ancient Greek manuscripts that are the basis of the modern versions of the New Testament, and scholars have uncovered more than 200,000 differences in those texts.
"Put it this way: There are more variances among our manuscripts than there are words in the New Testament," Ehrman summarizes.
Most of these are inconsequential errors in grammar or metaphor. But others are profound. The last 12 verses of the Gospel of Mark appear to have been added to the text years later -- and these are the only verses in that book that show Christ reappearing after his death.
Another critical passage is in 1 John, which explicitly sets out the Holy Trinity (the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit). It is a cornerstone of Christian theology, and this is the only place where it is spelled out in the entire Bible -- but it appears to have been added to the text centuries later, by an unknown scribe.
For a man who believed the Bible was the inspired Word of God, Ehrman sought the true originals to shore up his faith. The problem: There are no original manuscripts of the Gospels, of any of the New Testament.
He wrote a tortured paper at Princeton that sought to explain how an episode in Mark might be true, despite clear evidence to the contrary. A professor wrote in the margin:
"Maybe Mark just made a mistake."
As simple as it was, it struck him to the core.

This is the kind of scholarly research I had in mind when I write posts about the bible, to read about someone with the time on their hands to actually do it is like a tease! Of course, I've had little sleep over the past two days, anything intellectual is going to sound friggin' fabulous :)

Two things about this excerpt I like, for one, it's another example to me of how people come to the truth on their own. When you are ready to see it, it's there, and no amount of reasonable facts before you are ready to see it will persuade you. Second, his let-down sounds like mine as I described. D'oh!

tags: religion, atheism, bible

What do you want to teach?

2006-03-09T00:03:00.000-05:00

TC responded to my post about lippy kids:

Some may think soap to the mouth is extreme; but you have to teach your kids that some behavior is extremely intolerable. My wife and I have reluctently used bar soap to clean up potty mouth after a couple of warnings to two of our four children who needed it. It worked extremely well! Children are not all alike so what some people consider extreme punishments are not required by every child. As I said only two of our children needed it because they had strong stuburn personalities.

I can agree with the statement that children are not all alike, and that some behavior is extremely intolerable. For example, hurting someone is not to be tolerated, ever.

I find the image of holding down a child to put soap in their mouth so distasteful it turns my stomach. If my children can't count on me to not hurt them, who the heck can they count on?

How would you feel if this was done to you? I'd be furious, and would resolve, "well, I'll never let you see me doing that again! You can't control me!" It divides the parent and child, turning them against each other, OR squashes the child's will. This isn't generally considered good either, except for those who prefer sheep for children.

I, too, have a child with a very strong personality. (I don't label it 'stubborn' as that obfuscates and divides.) A master of her own ship, I call it. Yet, we got through her potty mouth stage without resorting to soap in the mouth. How, you ask? With humor, and perspective.

For perspective, I turn to the long run. What do I want to teach my child? Blind obedience in the form of "you will NOT say those words or you will be sorry"? Or, understanding the reason behind the preference, "no one wants to be around someone that keeps talking about things that happen in the bathroom! That's so gross!"

A child was singing an off-color ditty in the back of my van a few weeks back. My daughter giggled a bit, and I rolled my eyes, then the conversation turned to something else. She giggle because it was slightly funny, not because "mom is going to kill us", nor did she need to worry that I'd do something crazy like treat her friend with a bar of soap, nor was she a prude in danger of becoming the stick in the mud. The moment happened, it was over. It is not a hot button issue that she could push to get a reaction.

Contrast that to a child who was physically shut up by soap. The reason behind the rule wasn't understood (else the warning would have sufficed), and the self discipline to behave in a socially appropriate manner wasn't practiced. Soap squashed the behavior at the expense of the big picture.

Now if someone is belted at the playground, I want my children to be the first one there to say, "that is NOT OK!" Recognizing a situation that requires involvment is easier, I contend, when you don't have to deal with broad exceptions to the rule, such as "well, if a parent wants to hurt their own child to get quicker obedience, that's OK, but this case etc etc..."

tags: religion, atheism

The Bible of the Good and Moral Atheist

2006-03-08T22:25:00.000-05:00

I'm back from an excellent vacation. Thanks to all who commented while I was gone!

Here's a quick review of the Bible of the Good and Moral Atheist, a 112 page book supported by voluntary contributions, I believe. Page 61 (in pdf, marked page 58 if printed) has a few paragraphs on what for me is the million dollar question: "How should we teach our children about Atheism?" I like the list of Celebrations (page 74), the Reflections though I could do without the amens (starting on page 77), and on page 98 are a list of camps! Cool! Lots of web sites, quotes, and books.

vacation!

2006-02-24T23:14:00.000-05:00

I've had a really, really hard & hectic week leading up to tomorrow's vacation. I didn't get a chance to do more than read my mail (blogger emails me every time a comment is posted). I've drafted a post for marcguyver (no, I didn't forget), and six posts about CHILDREN just waiting for some attention. Stay tuned, I'll be back soon.

Meanwhile, Sunny California, here we come!

Examining a debate

2006-02-24T23:10:00.000-05:00

I think I have a handle on the frustration in a previous discussion.

Let's say you have a friend really into astrology. Let's say he uses an old book supposedly created by a famous mystic to create horoscopes. The book is a bit cryptic, and a bit "far out", but your friend feels he has the right way of reading it (maybe cross-referencing it with a different translation), so he can create really spot-on horoscopes. He "predicts" things when he's with you, constantly referring to events "because Jupiter is rising" and "your moon sign is in Sagittarius" etc.

Finally, you push back. "Wait, because Jupiter is on the rise, I am about to come into some money? That doesn't make any sense." But your friend persists, countering every example and reason you give for this to be senseless with another quote from the book. He will read and interpret from the book all day without ever seeing your point that the "evidence" from the book is next to worthless to you.

I've formed this hypothesis from a quote by our loquacious xtian himself: "Likewise, I'm just lending you my understanding of the Bible for your consideration" and everyone else is going, "AHHHHHH! How frustrating!"

For fun, I tried re-reading the conversation substituting "Jupiter is on the rise" for biblical content. I'm not sure what else to do with it, going over it point by point seems, um, pointless.

I should add that I feel everyone has their own take on the bible. If you feel it is important to your life, hey, knock yourself out! I had fun examining what the term "the bible" means, thanks to everyone for listening and your comments.

tags: religion, atheism

Trying feedburner

2006-02-23T20:36:00.000-05:00

I'm trying to set up the orange feedburner icon working on the sidebar. I think it is OK but I'm not sure. I also want to try to read my favorite blogs by subscribing to feeds, but haven't had a chance to figure it out!

tags: feedburner, atheism

The bible: my summary (continued)

2006-02-21T13:50:00.000-05:00

I previously pointed out interesting wikipedia entries about the bible but I missed an important page: the English Translations of the Bible. This entry says that there are about 450 translations of the bible over the past two thousand years! It also has (in some cases very brief) entries on about 120 bible versions and about three dozen biblical translators.

My favorite is a link from a very stubby entry:

Zondervan: does comparison of a number of translations, with a graphic showing where each fits on the spectrum of word-for-word (literal) or thought-for-thought (paraphrase). However, it may be skewed in favor of the New International Version (which the graphic shows located in the middle of the spectrum) which Zondervan publishes.

Anyone know if the graphic on the Zondervan page is approximately accurate? I would find it helpful to have a quick place to reference when I read when someone points out their preferred bible.

After deciding which books to put in the canon (and deciding which version of these books to use), now I see one has to pick the translation based on how much of the literal words versus the gleaned intended meaning is desired. When I hear someone stating what they think is a fact about their god, I tend to ask how they know. Now that I have a feeble grasp of the canonization and translation process that went into each passage, I wonder, how could anyone assert something as a "fact" when its source is the bible? Any insight here, Steven (my favorite biblical scholar)?

Thanks to my grounding in the scientific method, I generally hear the assertions many make about their invisible god while simultaneously wondering at their apparent innocence of how this world works.

Thanks to Kevin Parry who was recently writing about the Latin Vulgate Bible.

tags: religion, christianity, bible

Dogma vs. "Spirit"

2006-02-20T13:50:00.000-05:00

The Jewish Atheist recently published Dogma: The Real Enemy, a topic I think about alot. A friend yesterday described someone as a spirit with a beautiful soul, I didn't jump up and say, "Soul? Do you really believe that?" She frames her life as a spiritual quest, and I like her and I like to consider the world from her point of view. We get along very well but it makes me sad we can't be the best of friends because I'm not completely honest with her.

Should I open up to her? The longer I write and read about atheism, the sillier my silence seems. Yet, in this case, my friend isn't about Dogma, she's an artist who creates out of nothing, and battles personal demons. (At the risk of sounding conceited) I feel too shy to potentially upset her muse.

It's never black and white in real life. I take from her what she shares, and I try to provide a friendly ear, meanwhile my brain whirs and wonders.

tags: religion, atheism

My Trooper at the hospital

2006-02-18T22:45:00.000-05:00

My 18 month old tripped and split his forehead open on a sharp corner at a showroom today. Anyone seeing a head injury knows how much blood appears very quickly. I put a hand over it, then my husband took over, took him and applied pressure with tissues, while I went to figure out where we should take him. He stopped crying within a minute, and stopped bleeding within ten minutes, enough that we got a horrible glance at the almost half inch deep gash near his hairline. The ladies at the store had the perfect large band aid that sealed all four sides shut. I picked him up, and we headed to the car.

As a mommy, I could tell exactly what was about to happen. Baby will go into the car fine, my spirited 1st grader is going to get hysterical. Exactly. He gave her his famous "what is she so upset about now?" look, as I thought of a way to calm her down. "Here, squeeze my finger as hard as you can," I said as I twisted my arm to the back seat. "(Hysterical) NO!" "Please? I want to see which hand is stronger." Finally she did, left hand over right, then right over left, and calmed right down. (My cousin used to do that with me, and tease, "are you squeezing? I can barely feel it...")

We had asked the hospital on the phone if they could see him right away. My husband zoomed off with him when we arrived, and I went to check in. It took one hour just to check in. I imagined what was going on with my baby, but felt calm. My trooper lay on the gurney for that hour, snoozed for a bit but looked at my husband and stayed still for the rest of the time. He did cry while they put in the six stitches, but was fine again a few minutes later. If it had been my daughter in there, I can't even imagine the scene!

I got that crystal clear 'in the moment' feeling as I was with my family today.

As I don't believe that there is a post-death reunion, I try very hard to live each day to its fullest. If I make a mistake, I need to fix it, preferably today. If something needs to be said, I need to say it. Tomorrow might be too late, a point brought home anew today. It makes for a full, happy, examined life.

tags: religion, atheism

Misc: Blogger, and TTLB

2006-02-18T22:04:00.000-05:00

I feel like such an idiot sometimes! I set blogger to email me when someone comments on the blog, otherwise I'd never figure it out for comments on older posts. Well, just now, I realized that a recent email was marked "From:" that person, and not "noreply-comment@blogger.com" like I usually see. Cool! How did they do that?? A bit of digging, and it seems straightforward. If you have a Blogger account and publish your email, blogger uses your public email address in the From field instead of the noreply one. I'm sure everyone else has figured this out long ago.

So now I have a question: it seems that TTLB (The Truth Laid Bare) only counts inbound links from sites that also have registered with them, anyone know if this is true? Thanks in advance.

Power has been out all day...

2006-02-17T19:58:00.000-05:00

.... now trying to catch up (17 messages, yikes!). Thanks for taking the time to comment, jdhurf, jim, marcguyver, and stardust...

The bible: my summary

2006-02-16T19:00:00.000-05:00

jim jordan asked me to sum up the (Christian) bible in a paragraph. Great idea!

The bible is an important piece of literature, whose quotes are widely used in our culture. A compilation written by scores of authors, with differing viewpoints, beliefs, and agendas, it has some overarching themes, like rules for organization of social life, and justice. Many people find parts of it very beautiful, like the parables of Jesus. Many people attach special importance to it because they believe it to be inspired in some manner by their deity.

After I wrote the above, I checked out wikipedia's bible entry. I had understood that the bible wasn't a cut and dried document, but actually reading about the story is fascinating!

The Deuterocanonical books are "extra" OT books not found in the Hebrew Bible (and I read to my chagrin that the 'Hebrew Bible' contains the 'Torah' and is not a synonym for it, oops.)

The (New Testament) Apocrypha are "suppressed" books, from wikipedia: "Obedient Christians were warned away from these works now termed apocryphal, many of which were vigorously suppressed and survive only as fragments." The entries for Apocrypha & Deuterocanonical books contain links to each book in question, a veritable wealth of information.

The entry on the Biblical Canon touches on not only which books make up the Jewish and Christian bibles, but which version of each book is deemed proper.

It appears that it is true that the seemingly simple question "which bible?" can take a book's worth of information to fully answer.

tags: religion, atheism, bible

Deconversion; Dennett

2006-02-15T20:06:00.000-05:00

Reader gaz pointed out recently:

However, it's interesting that you choose a somewhat negative term like 'deconverted' to describe your transition, as if you feel that you have lost something or at least, experienced some sense of loss.

This is astute! I actually think of my transition as a de-evolution. To evolve means to become more complex and my beliefs are now much simpler. However, the other part of the evolution definition is "better". Obviously, I think my change IS for the better. So I punted, and said "deconversion".

But there's more... once you understand you've been mislead, it's like being punk'd! Doh! I'm an idiot! So, "deconversion" is somewhat negative also because I feel stupid not to have started questioning earlier in life.

gaz also recommends this funny article about Daniel C. Dennett, who has recently published Breaking the Spell : Religion as a Natural Phenomenon. Wow, gaz, this is totally up my alley and looks like a fabulous book. Thanks!

tags: religious deconversion, religion

Great Nathaniel Branden quote

2006-02-14T20:25:00.000-05:00

If, in any culture, children are taught, ‘We are all equally unworthy in the sight of God’ -

If, in any culture, children are taught, ‘You are born in sin and are sinful by nature’ -

If children are given a message that amounts to ‘Don’t think, don’t question, believe’ -

If children are given a message that amounts to ‘Who are you to place your mind above that of the priest, the minister, the rabbi?’ -

If children are told, ‘If you have value it is not because of anything you have done or could ever do, it is only because God loves you’ -

If children are told, ‘Submission to what you cannot understand is the beginning of morality’ -

If children are instructed, ‘Do not be “willful”, self-assertiveness is the sin of pride’ -

If children are instructed, ‘Never think that you belong to yourself’ -

If children are informed, ‘In any clash between your judgement and that of your religious authorities, it is your authorities you must believe’, -

If children are informed, ‘Self-sacrifice is the foremost virtue and the noblest duty’ -

- then consider what will be the likely consequences for the practice of living consciously, or the practice of self-assertiveness, or any of the other pillars of healthy self-esteem.

[Nathaniel Branden, The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, Bantam (May 1, 1995) p 291-292]

Source: gonesavage by way of Goosing the Antithesis.

gonesavage has a great blog, read about her great escape and here's an excerpt from another essay:

And if A & E [Adam & Eve] had no idea what Good and Evil were, how could they know that to eat from the Tree was Evil? How could they know that disobeying was Evil? If disobeying presupposes knowledge of Good and Evil, how could they know what disobeying was? Basically, what I’m seeing here is god planting a tree on purpose, telling two kids who don’t know what disobeying was to not disobey, then sentencing them to a life of pain (Genesis 3:16 and 3:17) when they disobeyed. This makes no sense. This makes god an asshole. If I had kids and treated them this way, I would be charged with abuse.

Thanks, Francois and gonesavage!

tags: atheism, parenting, religion

Convert, or else!

2006-02-14T00:00:00.000-05:00

When I researched atheism, it was like being on a one-way street (away from blog land), and I remember feeling so alone as I explored my beliefs! So I really enjoy the chance to read what others have written, and I also enjoy the interactions. I'm totally hooked.

Anyway, I read on religioustolerance.org that the difference between fundamentalists and other xtians is the issue of inerrancy. Fundies believe the bible is an error-free document, end of story. That's theory.

Reality of course is never black and white. From the five fundies I believe I have come across in the past two months, I have yet to hear one person attempt to defend the bible as a completely error-free document. Maybe there are people like this, either not blogging or just outside my sample.

Instead, the ones I've interacted with seem to explain that one needs to interpret the bible as a whole, and as a teeny tiny ancillary point, their interpretation just happens to be the correct one. I also get the feeling that the "personal relationship" part is the code phrase for "we aren't the child molesting Catholics", but I could be wrong on that one too.

More interesting is the fact that three of the five have said, to atheists as a group or to me in particular, "if only I could make you believe...". The first time, a slip of the tongue. The third time? Pattern. (It's been the same words each time, too, spooky, huh?)

This phrase "I want to make you" is really scary. I'm glad my children aren't near people like that, and I feel bad for any kids whose parents feel this way. I nurture my children because I value confidence, capability, compassion, independence, and free thought. Obedience, ie this "I know better than you" paradigm is repulsive to me. I cannot believe it is said accidentally.

tags: religion, atheism

In the dead of winter

2006-02-12T07:07:00.000-05:00

This morning, I poured myself my new favorite tea. I'm trying not to think about the beautiful Bird-Of-Paradise blooming in mojoey's front yard and the easy "just pop on a jacket" that Cassandra needs to go to the park. It's a bit depressing, though, because even though it's cold, most of the snow is gone. New England of yesteryear is gone.

And yet, my seed order from Fedco is on the table, ready to plant today. Today?

I'm going to try Trudi's WinterSown method of mini-greenhouses set in the snow. If you have ever seen the destruction a toddler can do in a few minutes, you understand why I'm not considering the indoor method of seed germination.

Fedco's catalogs are a source of info as well as seeds. Which companies grow our seeds? What would have happened had the "Plant Variety Protection Act" been enacted at the dawn of civilization? Should we worry about Monsanto and genetically engineered seed? What can we do about it?

Today, I'm not going to worry about global warming and frankengenes, and just get my hands in the dirt. Hey look, it just started snowing! Wouldn't it be nice if it could just work out in the end?

tags: winter, corporations, seeds

The Anything God

2006-02-09T21:36:00.000-05:00

stardust1954 pointed out this article Raising Humanist Children. The author Terri Mandell has some good advice (like using "one nation under the sky" in the Pledge). My favorite part is right at the end, where she says:

You don't have to tell kids that god doesn't exist. All you have to do is tell them that God can be anything they want it to be, because it's an idea that comes from the imagination.

And then let them figure out the rest for themselves.

I've been letting this seep into my brain for the past week. This feels so right and fits right in with my larger philosophy. I want my children to be independent, free thinkers, full of curiosity and compassion. I don't want to tell them what to think (which I'm sure would be a futile exercise anyway). I value allowing them the freedom to explore and make mistakes if need be, under my protection and gentle guidance. But how do I do this when "God" is such a part of our culture? Ms. Mandell's statement is a way of thinking about the issue in line with my parenting style.

A few weeks back, my 1st grader was telling me that she and her fellow student were talking about God at school. Which god, where? I asked. "He's everywhere!" she enthused. I let her talk and asked questions, but didn't know where to leave it. With this idea that God can be anything, I can really relax about the issue and indulge in creative thinking with her. I also think it'll remove the issue from becoming a "hot button" one for us as a family.

thanks, stardust!

tags: atheism, parenting

Our Nighttime Parenting Ritual

2006-02-07T22:37:00.000-05:00

I really hesitated before starting this blog because there are many bright, articulate atheists already blogging out there, but my passion is about children and I have questions on how to raise them with very few role models as my guide. mindgames asked me recently if I had any end of the night rituals, so I thought I'd share a little.

I need the end of the day to be very peaceful. My 1st grader is what Kurcinka calls spirited: a high energy, super sensitive, intense, persistent sweet little girl. The old "die" prayer I grew up with would be the last thing I need to get her to settle down!

So what does an atheist family do? Well, our ritual is pretty mellow. After stories, I turn out the light. I ask if there was anything that bothered her that day (and it is amazing the things she comes up with), so she can put that to rest.* Then I ask about her favorite part of the day, to get her smiling again. I then tell her how special she is to me, and how much I love her.

Usually one of us will do "see you later alligator / in a while crocodile". If she lies quietly with her eyes closed and head on the pillow, I'll sit with her for about ten minutes, stroking her hair, or if she is lucky, rubbing her back or giving her a hand massage.

That's all, a ritual stripped to the essentials of caring, belonging, tenderness and love. It works for us.

Anyone have other bedtime rituals? I'd love to hear about them.

*Recently, I try to start this at dinnertime if I know she's got a lot on her mind.

tags: atheism, parenting

Invisible atoms and old texts

2006-02-07T21:29:00.000-05:00

marcguyver has read stories about someone named Jesus in the bible and is frustrated (I think) because there are people that don't consider those words proof enough that that person lived. He asks another great question:

Lastly, have you ever seen an atom? And yet, if all of our abilities to actually see an atom (i.e. through an electron microscope) were destroyed, I'm guessing you'd still believe that atoms are real because of the 'testimony' or 'written record' of others who had seen them in the past; am I wrong?

I love this question.

Two guys were sitting around, postulating about the smallest possible particle that could exist. They called this concept the "atom", meaning "indivisible". What is the smallest piece of stone that can still be called a stone be like? How about the smallest part of this table leg, or the contents of this glass of wine? There wasn't an electron microscope in sight as this thought experiment was performed by Greek philosophers Democritus and Leucippus in 500 BC. They came up with a theory that it was the different sizes and shapes of these "atoms" that caused different physical properties such as "hard" or "liquid".

It turns out that their theory didn't hold up when examined using the scientific method. Other theories were proposed, and tested, and as early as 1897 there were insights that the "indivisible" atom had to be comprised of subatomic particles.

Ernst Ruska invented the electron microscope based on knowledge that electrons possess a wave aspect, magnetic fields could manipulate electrons, and that the shorter electron waves would magnify more than ordinary light waves. You couldn't happen to invent an electronic microscope without understanding electrons!

But even with this microscope could we not see an atom. That had to wait until Erwin Muller invented the Field ion microscope in approx. 1951.

How cool is that!

If we were to lose all our scientific knowledge, there we would be on square one with Democritus and Leucippus, postulating about things we can't see, and slowly performing experiments to understand (again) what it is that makes up our universe. If we were to lose all copies of the bible, no amount of sitting around postulating would re-create it. That is why I can believe in atoms though I can't see them, but not, by extension, the contents of a very old book.

tags: religion, christianity, jesus

Jesus (Myth?): examining Suetonius

2006-02-06T23:21:00.000-05:00

From Steven Harris' blog: "Suetonius, Claudius 25:4, approx. 120AD "He banished from Rome all the Jews, who were continually making disturbances at the instigation of one Chrestus" approx AD 49, according to Steven.

There must be a mistake! How is a group goaded on by a dead person? There should be a bigger story! Jews travelling to Rome spread oral (presumably) tales of what? Jesus walking on water? Turning the other cheek? Dying for sins? Which caused the Jews to agitate enough that the Romans threw them out, just here but not elsewhere in the Empire. Here is an ancient map showing the Roman Empire (and modern for orientation).

I have spent two days reading about Roman Emperor Claudius. Fascinating! I had no idea we knew so much! He became Emperor just after Jesus supposedly died. I could not find another reference to this Jewish Banishment that he (supposedly) ordered. The stuff we do know about is pretty neat, from his relationship with the Senate to his wives to his cause of death (mushrooms).

Just after becoming Emperor, Claudius in his 'famous' Letter to the Alexandrians didn't permit many Jewish families to move to Alexandria; if you read it you'll see he isn't the kindest towards Jews.

Still, Jewish historian Josephus records that Claudius "then reaffirmed the rights and freedoms of all the Jews in the empire" (quote is from wikipedia, I think referencing book 19 chapter 5 section 2). I don't know to find the date that book 19 refers to, anyone? Was it before or after the banishment? Josephus doesn't seem to notice the banishment. Should he have known about it?

It was in Roman historian Gaius Suetonius Tranquillus' book The Twelve Caesars that contains the reference to Chrestus. He section on Claudius was finished around 112 AD, sixty-ish years after the banishment. The original Latin with translation is available, if I knew Latin I would try to pin down "instigation". Where did he learn that Jews had been banished from Rome? Where are the "imperial records" that he supposedly worked from? One part of this wikipedia entry says he is very significant and a main source of work, but the last line says much is "gossip and factually unrealiable", with no data to back up either view. Annoying!

How many Jews were banished? How long did the banishment last, when did it end? Were there guards posted around Rome to keep out the Jews? How did Claudius know the name of their instigator (Christ the ghost?)? I think I could spend another two days on this and have more questions. Feedback, please...

tags: religion, christianity, jesus

Jesus (Myth?): examining non-NT sources

2006-02-06T22:00:00.000-05:00

I can't remember a time in my life without stories about Jesus! It wasn't until recently that I started having my doubts, cynical as I am, I tend to think it's a very tiny minority of people that fabricate stories that are presented as the truth (even when presented with ample evidence to the contrary). How could this stuff be made up? Why would anyone do it?

I want to say thanks for all the time Steven & Marc have taken to dig up extra-biblical references about Jesus. I have so much to learn, for example it took me a while to find the meaning of MSS as Marc uses. Check out that link, there are some pictures of ancient manuscripts and codices - including the recently mentioned Codex Sinaiticus, how cool is that??

Steve points out seven extra-biblical sources (excluding Josephus). I can't stand not researching them, so I'll do them one at a time.

Lya, stardust1954, thanks for the links!

tags: religion, christianity, jesus

Challenge updated

2006-02-03T22:32:00.000-05:00

In this post I asked whether I could ignore the bible itself as a reference source to that age-old question "was Jesus a real person, or a myth?" In addition to my cynical side saying "huge bias there!", the Jewish Freak points out the extrodinary evidence required for supernatural claims, to which point Steven Harris & I seem OK to put to the side. I don't know how to judge the wide enough circulation point, lemme think on that.

To see how Steven separates the theological vs historical parts made me reconsider. Can a theist pull out passages to support an argument without also asserting the supernatural claims contained within must be true? It appears so. This means I can't blithely dismiss historic evidence just because the source of it is the bible (though I know I will still worry about bias). OK, I'll try not to. Thanks for the clarification, Steven.

While chasing down guidelines for examining historic data (following marcguyver's lead, though he uses uncredited sources), I found an essay by skeptic Jeffery Jay Lowder, cofounder of the Internet Infidels, concluding that independent confirmation really doesn't need to be provided. (It was written before Doherty's work.)

Steven, if you would be so kind, would you provide a link to somewhere containing what you think are the best guesses for dates of when the Gospels (NT?) were written?

I made some yummy peanut butter cookies with my daughter yesterday, and I wish I could hand them around. Thanks to everyone for taking the time to write so extensively & passionately.

Next post: examining the extra-bibical sources provided by marc & steven and responding to stuff ya'll had to say previously, I did read it all...

And I must rant that trying to read long comments in blogger in a skinny little column was driving me crazy, I switched it to the annoying pop-up window type to be able to expand it. Am I just lucky to get people who really have something to say, or what?

tags: religion, christianity, jesus

groan, groan

2006-02-02T19:39:00.000-05:00

I see a great discussion going on in my last post, and I haven't even parsed it yet, nor had the time to respond in kind to marc & steven while I see franky has a post that pulls me back to what I really want to talk about (children).

Sweet baby that he is, however, he has given me a cold. I'm handing him over to his father (nothing more sexy than a dad nurturing our little ones!) so I can snooze. Back soon...

Jesus is a Myth Challenge Examined

2006-02-01T13:14:00.000-05:00

I wrote: "if you have any proof outside of the bible about Jesus' existence, I (and the world) would love to hear about it."

Steve Harris correctly points out that the NT could be used for theological claims and historical claims. I didn't think of it this way, but that makes sense.

Certainly I was trying to head off the theological arguments in the form of "since the bible was written by my God, the stuff in it must be true! Since it says someone walked on water, it must have really happened!"

What about historical claims? There is still a bit of a problem, because when someone has a vested interest in an outcome, the claim needs to be taken with a grain of salt.

So is there a way to find the information in the NT that can help prove the point (Jesus -> real person?) while being cognizant of the vested interest?

Try me out, I'd love to hear what you think.

tags: religion, christianity, jesus

Jesus Is A Myth and Curiosity

2006-01-31T20:41:00.000-05:00

One of the best parts of the net is getting a chance to interact with all sorts. I love seeing different perspectives and trying to understand them.

So, I thought it was great when marcguvyer was asking me questions about my beliefs. For example, he asked a great question about Jewish writer Josephus, and I spent over two hours researching and writing a response.

Well, in the comments on that post, he never mentioned my research, but gave me a pile of similar type questions. Wow, I thought, this is going to keep me busy for a month! He also mentioned that he started a discussion of the topic of Jesus/myth on his blog. Of course, I went to check it out.

At first I was really surprised. Marc tends to write posts designed to hit your emotions, and here was scholarly-type writing. After I spent a while reading it, I realized it didn't address the question. The main argument seems to be that since many people copied the bible by hand, its contents should be considered historic. Then I started wondering. Why such a strange approach to prove Jesus existed? Why not link to the sources of the 'facts' he provides? What is it they say, 92.5% of all statistics are made up? Well, I google'd a bit and found that Marc's post isn't original research, it's duplicated far and wide across theological type sites. No bias there, certainly not, right??

I feel so disappointed and slightly sickened about this. On my post, I linked to four neutral sites because I want people to read what I write, and read where I form these opinions, and make up their own minds. I have nothing to hide. I guess I assumed this is what people do.

Duplicating prose from a biased point of view and calling them facts is an interesting way to argue. He could have dug up some interesting research, there are tons out there. And I find it frustrating that no one read my links on Marc's site and said, "that point of view leaves out ..." or "did you consider ...?". That would be an interesting, fun conversation! Instead, I found the attitude "There Must Be A Jesus no reason still There Must Be A Jesus."

What if we found a diary written by Pontius Pilate that said in part:

I've met and condemned many criminals in my life. Most I can't remember, but there was one, who as I recall had not committed any crimes, but yet the gathering insisted that he be put to death. Funny thing, that one. Anyway, after a hard day of work, I would call for some wine...

That's the kind of independent evidence anyone would love to see.

In that thread's comments, Dan Trabue speaks about how his faith isn't threatened by the lack of evidence of a Jesus. Why aren't more people curious? Is it considered too cynical to even imagine for a minute that someone who claims to have a Magic Book might just be after your money?

tags: religion, christianity, jesus

Alan Alda; the Chumscrubbers

2006-01-26T22:14:00.000-05:00

I recently finished Hawkeye's latest book Never Have Your Dog Stuffed : And Other Things I've Learned. Alda describes turning to Catholicism to counterbalance his life with his mentally ill mother (with a Close Encounter with Brother Jacob (shudder)). He then questions, questions, questions ("why do we have to bow our heads before the host?") but doesn't draw the conclusions. You'll still like Alda, but as one amazon reviewer said, "he keeps you at arm's length." If he were a little older, I bet he'd have just said what he thinks.

I hesitate to link this in (no knowledge before watching a movie is GOOD) but make The Chumscrubber your next netflix pick. I almost missed it because the name made me think about cleaning fishheads, please just ignore the name. Great actors, great performances, hilarious, my kind of cynical / strange movie. Great 80's look to the two teens. No atheist issues, think: family dynamics.

Technorati tags: alan alda, movie reviews

Some (recent) favorite posts

2006-01-23T21:12:00.000-05:00

I just want to point out two articles that I haven't stopped thinking about for the past week or so -- Lya's great post about the Shabbat, ie the Sabbath. Reading it, for an overtired mom with a young family, is like seeing a picture of some yummy chocolate pudding that isn't in front of me. I started reading the link she supplied, because if I had a day off, could I consider making cookies with my kids a hobby? So far, I get the idea that it would be verboten.

I also like A Rational Being's well written summary on a book about Bush he was reading. I'm having to deal in the periphery with an alcoholic only recently in life, but it has opened my eyes to what "being an alcoholic" really means, like destroying everything around you. In this case, it's just a family to destroy, for Bush, it's the world (insert evil 'heee hee hee' noise).

Are You a Heretic? part 4

2006-01-23T13:00:00.000-05:00

marcguyver has another excellent question:

Do Josephus' writings as a historian count as proof of Jesus' existence?

Josephus was one of the first non-Christians to write about Jesus, in a passage known as the the "Testimonium Flavianum."

A Quick Background
Josephus was born around the time that Jesus supposedly died. When Josephus was about 40, he published his first work, a History of the Jewish War from A.D. 66-73. When translated to English (and by using the 'print preview' feature in my browser), it is over 300 pages long, and was split into eight "books".

His second work is the Antiquities of the Jews, in which contains the Testimonium Flavianum. Originally written in Greek, Englishman William Whiston's translation in 1737 is in wide use even today. The Antiquities contains twenty books, each between 25-45 (English) pages. As the copyright ran out long ago, we can find his entire text online, for example on Early Jewish Writings or Early Christian Writings, two site apparently run by the same person.

He also wrote a long autobiography and the relatively short On the Antiquities of the Jews. We know a lot about him, from his patrons to his three marriages.

Concerning the Evidence
Thanks to stardust1954, you can read about the debate as to the authenticity of Josephus' Testimonium Flavianum.

Let's say that Josephus DID write the truth as he saw it about Jesus. For grins, I'll compare this to contemporary times.

Let's say a tremendously long book is published by author Joe. In it, he states there was a person name Bob, assasinated around the time of his (Joe's) birth, and that people found Bob's speeches to be inspiring. Also suppose there happens to be a biography about Bob that his own family publishes. The biography makes Bob sound like a great guy, even given the factual errors it contains. Imagine that Joe is the first to mention Bob outside the families' book.

Would you believe that Bob was real?

To me, even if the disputed paragraph in Josephus turns out to have been written by him, it isn't really proof of a historical Jesus.

There is this feeling that over two thousand years ago, people were little more than cave-men scratching out an existence. But there is an astonishing amount of information we have on people during this time, like Julius Caesar (I linked to his Chronology) and here are biographies of six of his contemporaries: Titus Labienus - Cicero - Pompey - Theodosius of Bithynia - Catiline - Titus Pomponius Atticus.

I just found a good essay about the debate on religioustolerance.org.

To me, the bible contains factual errors on details of the life of someone named Jesus, and the first reference to him outside of the bible can't be called compelling. Believe if you want/need to, but I don't see it.

tags: religion, christianity, jesus

Now I lay me down to sleep...

2006-01-22T18:56:00.000-05:00

It should be pretty simple to understand the needs of happy & healthy children. Nurture them, create a safe and stimulating home environment, freely give unconditional love. Use opportunities to encourage creativity, curiousity, and compassion.

Well, I went to see if people still used the sweet little "die" poem I posted earlier, and I found one of the most frightening pages I've seen yet on the web. Charles Kirkpatrick uses this prayer on his site Sermons4Kids.com to suggest indoctrinating children with the theme "Looking forward to the resurrection". He suggest finding a doll "that can open and close its eyes", (and excuse me for a second because I can't help but summerize the whole page) along with two scripture quotes, a story about Job suffering and dying, a teaching of Jesus, and a COLORING PAGE. In smaller letters at the bottom, it says that some people felt this too disturbing for young children. Obviously the author doesn't share this concern!

Well, why not frighten a child with the thought of death while they are relaxing into sleep?

Hey, let's give them some other things to think about:

...
and if a fire should light my bed,
mom will come quick, just rest my head;
and if an earthquake should shake the ground,
mama will make sure that I am found;
and if a tarantula should be strolling near,
papa will take care of it, never fear.
[mamas don't do tarantulas]
time to close my eyes, rest, and pray,
hope that a flood won't sweep me away.

Do I add Mr. Kirkpatrick to my list? Stay tuned for more...

tags: religion, prayer, nightmares

I changed the name!

2006-01-21T07:17:00.000-05:00

As I wrote in my first post, I have less than normal time to try to publish my thoughts.

I wanted to use a TLA similar to BJU for the previous post, I was trying out BLU, but didn't like that, and couldn't think of anything else except FLU. Meanwhile, my baby kept waking up, so there I was, literally running up and down the stairs every ten minutes, burning to get the post out, but not able to concentrate. So I published, cuddled my little guy, then figured out what I should say...

So, my commentary came out harsher than I wanted (than I feel), and I couldn't fix it until now!

Introducing TRU

2006-01-20T22:02:00.001-05:00

Recently, I've been in discussions with 3 or 4 folks affiliated in some way with BJU (Bob Jones University). I found, to my surprise, that none of these folks could identify what it is about Pat Robertson that makes everyone cringe. The answer I thought was clear: Pat Robertson spews HATE. So what is it about attending BJU that makes this so hard to understand?

Instead of spending a gazillion dollars at BJU, why not come to my newly formed program at TRU: The Real University?

We will study a code of ethics to guide one through life ("Treat others the way you want them to treat you. Take care of them.") There are no other rules. You will be expected to apply this rule.

We will have one book, The Three Questions. You are expected to read this book.

We will have guest lectures from incredible people from all walks of life.

We will have no exams. Paper topics will examine the aspects of religion that make it hard to apply the code of ethics.

All for one low tuition bill! Stop wasting your money and apply today!

Updated 21jan06 to rename my university. Always willing to serve you!

tags: religion, atheism, college

Mean Appeal for a "Christian Nation"

2006-01-20T11:57:00.000-05:00

Most people who have my email don't bother sending me those ubiquitous unsigned emails floating around like "Help Pay for Cancer Treatment", "Swiffer Kills Dogs", "Man Overloads Car With Lumber" (actually, this one WAS true).

But I still get them occasionally, like one this appeal for a Christian Nation. The version I received, however was punctuated with a "DID YOU KNOW?" every line and ended with this generous, life affirming message:

"It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, it is very hard to understand why there is such a mess about having the Ten Commandments on display or "In God We Trust" on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance. Why don't we just tell the other 14% to Sit Down and SHUT UP!!!
If you agree, pass this on"

I wrote back:

Hello! I assume you passed this on so I could see it and not because you believe it! Instead of being convincing, I find this email frustrating because someone thinks they can use make-believe facts and appeals to emotion to stand in place of a logical argument. Quality discourse in our country continues to be AWOL.

Please read this and forward to your friend:
http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/capital.asp

stardust1954 has a brief post on the Eastern Pediment, points out this article on the Supreme Court embellishments and was kind enough to write this on the "SHUT UP" sentiment:

The American Bill of Rights guarantees to every person in the United States the rights and liberties that are the basis of democracy. The first of the ten amendments that make up the Bill of Rights guarantees the freedom of religion, speech, assembly and petition. Justice William J. Brennan wrote, “If there is a bedrock principle underlying the First Amendment, it is that government may not prohibit the expression of an idea simply because society finds the idea itself offensive or disagreeable.” The commitment of the principle of free speech has been repeatedly tested beginning with the Alien and Sedition Acts of 1798 to the present day intolerance for individual and unpopular opinion.

These people who want to shut us up, are saying they hate the American Bill or Rights and do not support the Constitution of this great and DIVERSE land.

Thanks stardust!!

tags: religion, christian nation

Is a Belief in God Beneficial? Or, What's an Atheist to Do?

2006-01-19T21:22:00.000-05:00

Here is the post that I wanted to write, but at the rate I'm going it would have taken me six months and still not be as good! The Jewish Atheist writes about the positive benefits from being religious and ways for us atheists to not miss out on them.

(thanks to the Jewish Freak & his blogroll.)

Technorati tags: atheism, religion

Are You a Heretic? part 3

2006-01-19T20:17:00.000-05:00

I do not mean for this to go on & on, but I want to answer a question and consider what I learned from the author of the quiz.

marcguyver asks:

You [freethoughtmom] said, "I don't think Jesus is God incarnate, but not because God can't dwell in flesh." Not trying to stir up trouble here but, can you tell me then what you think Jesus is?

I had no clue when I started researching the Christmas story about three years ago that I'd have ever said this, but, well, (pause) ... I think that Jesus is a mythos. This was the last step in my deconversion, and it was shocking for me to come to this conclusion, and I'm pretty sure any theist, no matter how open minded, will think this is nuts. So let me quickly add, it doesn't matter what any one person believes (as long as they aren't hurting children with those beliefs), but that's the perspective I was trying to take the quiz from.

And from the quiz author himself, Steven Harris, I am technically NOT a heretic just for the belief of Jesus -> Mythos. He also points out that to him, my position is extremely shaky and practically fantastical. I'll leave that to "well, I guess we have very different opinions." Good luck with your thesis, Steven, and if you have any proof outside of the bible about Jesus' existence, I (and the world) would love to hear about it.

Thanks to all for the comments!

Technorati tags: religion, heresy, quiz, god

Are You a Heretic? part 2

2006-01-18T22:07:00.000-05:00

Thanks to Elena for a clarification on the Heretic quiz. I thought "heresy" meant complete rejection of the Church's teachings, but upon closer inspection, the dictionary really does point out that it could be having just one "wrong" opinion.

The author at the Christian Apologetics and Research Ministry points out that the heresies he lists are to him essential ones, ie the "serious assaults upon the character of God, of Christ, and salvation itself" (and they appear to be the ones in the quiz). Unhelpfully, he doesn't describe the process of determining which teachings are heresies, and blithely excuses the horrific persecutions of heretics.

An in-depth study of one heresy should be instructive, so I studied the Donatist Heresy, my results from the quiz. Funny thing, Wikipedia's take on the topic is radically different from Catholic Answers'. In any case, the church decided that even if a priest makes a grave sin, say repudiating his faith, he may still officiate over the sacraments (ie sole moral authority lies with the church). Donatists wanted priests who did the right thing. When it was apparent that this idea had a lot of traction by the number of Donatist churches, it was firmly dealt with and the Donatists are no more.

A story of Christians killing Christians, to keep the money and power within one group. Why does the church think it has the high moral road, again?

Technorati tags: religion, heresy, quiz, god

Introducing the Horror Roll

2006-01-16T22:50:00.000-05:00

I'm trying out a new sidebar on the right "Keep kids away from..." for those who want a quick list to help protect little ones. Lame title, but the Armchair Potentate seems to be MIA, I could use his help for an alliterative name. I think "Children Chasers" sounds too sick, and doesn't cover the people or groups that endanger kids in other ways. As usual, comments welcomed.

Technorati tags: religion, safe children

Are You a Heretic?

2006-01-15T21:20:00.000-05:00

I found what should have been a fun quiz called Are You A Heretic? But, it doesn't work! It scored me as 'Donatism' (and now I've lost the notes on what THAT meant).

It presupposes theism, and I get the feeling it will never score heretic. For this question:
Jesus was not really God incarnate, because God cannot indwell corrupted matter
you have a choice of agreeing or disagreeing. I don't think Jesus is God incarnate, but not because God can't dwell in flesh. So, how should I score myself? I posted a clarification question on his web site, but no response so far.

But, if you have all the "right" answers, he replies: "Congratulations, you think JUST LIKE I DO!". Actually, he doesn't really, but almost does.

His web site has a cool "email me when someone replies" feature. Now I want that!

tags: religion, heretic, god, quiz

Another Theist For Governor

2006-01-15T08:55:00.000-05:00

While I am psyched to see more parties besides Republicans & Democrats out there, do we really need another theist??

Go, BigHeathenMike

2006-01-14T02:05:00.000-05:00

I had to pull this recent quote out of BigHeathenMike's blog:

What is so scary about ideas? This guy [a freak on Wa-Wa's Heaven special] sounds like those dipshits in the States like Fred Phelps who hate homosexuals so much they picket the funerals of gays. What are they afraid of? Is being an atheist or a homosexual so attractive to people that even exposure to the ideals or lifestyle will instantly convert a Muslim away from their grovelling or a Southern Baptist to sodomy and raves? Is the way of life for a Muslim so horrible and unfulfilling that being around an atheist would crumble their view of the world and cause them to renounce their faith in favour of godless heathenism and the betterment of the lives of his/her family, friends, and community?

tags: religion, atheism, fear

First Bishop to Report a Personal Sexual Abuse Encounter

2006-01-14T01:22:00.000-05:00

I have been trying to figure out how long the Catholic church has had priests molesting children. Here's a new piece of data: an Auxiliary Bishop in Detroit reports that he was a victim in 1945. He is brave both for talking about the issue and to ask several states to temporarily lift statues of limitations so more lawsuits could go forward.

A Washington Post article reports that the molester "has been dead for more than a decade" and quoted Thomas Gumbleton as "I've been saying for 10 years that these cases should be handled with pastoral sensitivity..." That's a bit odd because the scandal went public around 2002.

Gumbleton kept his silence until the older priest died. I can guess why he'd keep quiet (controlled by the abuser and/or ashamed for the church), but I can also see how other molested children would have wished for someone to have stopped him sooner.

As the trial for the inmate that killed child molester John Geoghan is in the headlines, here's a well-written non-Boston Globe article from 2002 showing the stunning lack of compassion that the church has demonstrated.

How is it that someone whose life mission is to minister could turn their back on the ones hurting the most? What got in the way of basic empathy?

tags: religion, catholic church, sex abuse

Background, and Foreground

2006-01-12T22:05:00.000-05:00

As the Armchair Pontentate correctly points out, my deconversion story is a bit lean. I left out the details I thought were boring, like early life and current thoughts.

I was brought up Roman Catholic. The earliest memory I have of anything god-related is the happy little prayer we used to recite before bed:
Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray the lord my soul to keep
and if I die before I wake
I pray the lord my soul to take

I also remember being congratulated when learning to kneel on the pew.

Even way back I knew Catholicism isn't what I'd consider a good model for a moral, examined life. I clearly remember my mother teaching me that girls are just as good as boys, but not to ask about why churches are exempt from this idea. I was also dumbfounded by confession (I do something wrong, feel bad but don't fix it, tell a priest and say five Hail Mary's? Wow.)

Did you know that if there aren't enough boys around to be alter boys, the church will use girls? Now the thought fills me with horror, but I remember my sister being an alter boy. Once when she was up there, I noticed my mother turning purple next to me. I looked up, and there was my sister and another alter boy crying and shaking with silent laughter as the priest did his magical cannibalistic transubstantion. The two of them were in profile view, facing each other, kneeling, behind and on either side of the priest. Every time he lifted up his arms, the 'holy man' was farting. This image to this day makes me laugh out loud.

So, from a young age, I started to question what I was told, though it was many years later before I was truly free of it. I didn't take notes as I went, so it's hard to reconstruct the timeline.

Now? My deconversion as I storied came about in a one-way vacuum, so I was surprised while lurking exchristian.net forums that there are all types of labels that atheist-type people use. What is 'Strong atheism' and 'Secular Humanism', and does it apply to me? I don't know. I value thinking, I love knowledge and testing out theories & beliefs. I would love to learn about something beyond us that cannot be explained. It would have to be compelling, however, because I strongly suspect there isn't anything out there, and that is perfectly OK.

tags: Christianity, Catholicism, religion, god, atheism

No Small Mission

2006-01-09T22:53:00.000-05:00

After I realized that I was atheist, that is "without belief", I spent a long time contemplating the world from my new vantage point. One thing I thought about was all the needless suffering of children everywhere caused by nothing but side effects of people's hyperactive imaginations. Could I just ignore this pain and live my life, or, as vjack recently wrote, should I be promoting human welfare? Hey, let me at it, what can I do to make children's lives better?

I wondered if I should start Yet Another Atheist Blog (YAAB). I hesitated for so long, because every time I jumped on the web, I learned something new. What about forums? I lurked on a few, and Lya recently reported on her excursion into Christian forum-land. What about on the street? I'm still working on that.

My passion is about healthy children, although I haven't written too much about this topic yet, it's coming, as I first jot down a few more thoughts swirling in my brain.

I feel a deep sense of gratitute for those who first started this climb, against the popular direction. This blog happens because I can draft those brave ones. Thanks to you!

tags: healthy children, atheism, religion

Pat Robertson: even the xtians can't watch

2006-01-07T22:44:00.000-05:00

Yes, it's true, even the Christians can tell that Pat Robertson isn't All That. This blog title says it all: Would somebody *PLEASE* shut this man up??

mounty also nails the particularly annoying as "xenophobic isolationist NWO-sniffing paranoids". Well stated, mounty!

tags: pat robertson, religion, christianity

[updated 06jan08 to link to monty's profile]

Founding Father Thomas Paine

2006-01-06T23:54:00.000-05:00

Great excerpt again by stardust1954 on Founding Father Thomas Paine. Common Sense is what I associate with Paine, I don't think I was exposed to his other writings!

tags: founding fathers, religion, deism, paine

Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic Motivation

2006-01-04T22:46:00.000-05:00

Ever walked by a company bulletin board and see "Job Well Done, Johnny!" posted by a manager, and get a creepy feeling? Alfie Kohn's book Punished by Rewards helped me understand why this is so distasteful.

Extrinsic Motivation is doing something because of a promise of a reward (a 'carrot') or the threat of a punishment (a 'stick'). Kohn's book examines what happens when students or business people are manipulated via extrinsic motivators like pizza, money or gold stars.

Intrinsic Motivation is doing something from within yourself (intrinsic = 'originating or due to causes within a body').

Let's apply this to moral codes.

Johnny doesn't kill Fred, because he doesn't want to go to Hell. Extrinsic motivator.
Johnny doesn't kill Fred because he wants to go to Heaven. Extrinsic motivator.
Johnny doesn't kill Fred because it is against the law. Extrinsic motivator.
Johnny doesn't kill Fred because his heart tells him that isn't right. Intrinsic motivator.

Extrinsically motivated people are externally manipulated people.

I'm trying to raise my kids to be intrinsically motivated. It's harder because I can't demand instant obedience. I have to take a longer view, and go over again and again, "would you want to be treated that way? Is that OK to do?"

Here's a short quote from Mr. Kohn:

There are at least 70 studies showing that extrinsic motivators— including A's, sometimes praise, and other rewards—are not merely ineffective over the long haul but counterproductive with respect to the things that concern us most: desire to learn, commitment to good values, and so on. Another group of studies shows that when people are offered a reward for doing a task that involves some degree of problem solving or creativity—or for doing it well—they will tend to do lower quality work than those offered no reward.

If this is true, our country is full of extrinsically motivated (religious) people who over the long haul have less commitment to good values.

Sounds about right to me.

tags: religion, ethics, atheism

The sun god Mithra

2006-01-03T20:55:00.000-05:00

When I learned that Christmas was held on "Mithra's birthday", December 25th, I always thought it would be interesting to find out more about Mithra ... thanks stardust1954 for these excerpts.

tags: christianity, early christianity, mithra

Why Religiosity Matters to All

2006-01-01T17:01:00.000-05:00

How could religion be harmful to humanity? Here's one reason. Send me an email finishing this story. I won't spam you, but I'll send a short response, and that's all. (By the way, I can't get online every day, so it might take me a few days, I'm sorry.)

Your new neighbor doesn't scare you. He reminds you a bit of the fifth grade bully in your class, the one that picked on the first graders. It's his stepson that you are a bit worried about, because he always walks around looking exhausted with dark circles under his eyes. You are always kind towards the son, but he never says anything to you.

Dog on the leash, you tie on your running shoes for a brisk walk to the store. As you walk by the neighbor's house, you hear a commotion and look through a screen door. There, in front of you, you see the boy about to be raped by his stepdad. The dad has his back to you, but the boy is half turned, screaming and crying, begging for help. Your heart is thumping. Your cell phone is in your back pocket, a baseball bat is on the ground, your dog is leaning forward. You ...

email me at freethoughtmom@gmail.com

tags: religion, ethics, god

Resolution 2006: Bravery

2006-01-01T12:50:00.000-05:00

How do I raise my children to the highest moral standard? I practice this daily, the way a surgeon practices medicine. I practice what I've learned about parenthood. I make mistakes, I apologize and try again. The road of raising children is long and hard, but also tremendously rewarding.

"How can you teach children about morality without the Bible?" is an honest question. I don't know where to start. So I don't.

I'm assuming most people haven't actually read much of the bible (because I think then there would be many more skeptics), so to say "the bible is a terrible place to learn about morals!" isn't going to answer the question for them, and most likely close their mind (someone feeling attacked stops listening and starts defending).

This blog is helping me find my voice, so I can answer this question for them. Children are too important to let misinformation stand.

If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed. Albert Einstein

Joseph Ratzinger participated in the cover-up

2005-12-30T13:43:00.000-05:00

The AP headline: Judge Dismisses Pope From Sex-Abuse Suit.

When Pope John Paul II died last year, I read every news story I could find, to see if there was more information on how much he did or didn't know about the extent his priests were molesting little children or the equally horrific cover up (like transferring pedophile priests around to 'solve' the problem). The best I could find was a wimpy "well, he was pretty sickly towards the end, y'know?" even though I knew he friggin' promoted Cardinal Law to a spot conveniently far away from the Massachusetts AG reach.

But, back to the new pope, Benedict XVI. He's not named in the above suit, not because he wasn't helping with the cover-up, but because he's "head of a foreign state." How nice for him.

tags: religion, pope, Joseph Ratzinger

Modern day Three Kings

2005-12-30T12:34:00.000-05:00

Three Mormons visited yesterday. In winter, our front walk has a skinny little platform over the rocks up to the front door, so when I saw three nicely dressed women perching on it, balancing in an earnest little row, I was prepared.

"I would be happy to read your literature if you would read this," handing over my copy of Under the Banner of Heaven. "I know this is mostly concerned with the fundamentalist Mormons, but it also lays out the history of the beginnings of Mormonism. Pass it on when you're done."

Actually, I thought of that later; Jason Bourne I am not. I just stopped her before she got far with a "sorry, we aren't Mormon. Thanks anyway!" I'm too cheap to give away a book to be trashed, anyway.

I'm guessing they wanted to cluster at the door, but didn't have the option due to the slushy snow. The platform was designed to help with shovelling and to be used one at a time. These three looked truly hilarious as they had to carefully turn around to walk away.

tags: mormons, religion

The ultimate right brain activity: going to church

2005-12-22T19:19:00.000-05:00

We've all read them, the testimonials of people who talk about the love of their god that they really feel while in church. To nonreligious folks, it can be hard sometimes to not roll your eyes.

When I was in college (>decade ago), I read some great research that gives me a context to understand this. I've been searching the web for articles, but it's surprisingly hard to finding articles on brain research that doesn't involve paying $19.99 for a CD, book, or "course."

I learned that here in the west, we live almost constantly in our left brain, the logical / language side: driving cars, grocery shopping, talking on the phone at work, etc. We, people here in general, rarely get a chance to use the right brain, the home of the artistic and emotional side of things. According to said misplaced article, hyper-left-focused Westerners should be on the lookout for activating those elusive right brain waves by doing things like burning incense & meditating, or maybe watching TV. (Because of this research, I did t'ai chi for many years and received many benefits from this "meditation in motion".)

It is the long waves in the right brain that make someone feel good & at peace.

In a completely different context, I leaned that when you hear the same exact words over and over, you don't "hear" it with your left brain any more, but your right. It becomes like a meditation, and scientists can measure the calming, long-wave brain activity.

Imagine one sitting in a religious service for the umpteenth time. Their brain long ago stopped interpreting the liturgy with the logical, "what is the meaning behind the words" side; instead the right side kicks in with what has become a meditation. Add to that the incense, music, beautiful windows, and surrounded by friends and you can see why someone would feel very calm and peaceful in this setting. And, as the link above about the TV mentions, at this state, they might be more receptive to ideas while in the throes of this right brain activity. Throw in a good speaker with an instinctive flair for emotional language, and suddenly you can grok how mega-churches have appeared.

I wish more people had this kind of information, because once it is understood, it loses its power of subconscious control.

After reading many articles, I suspect some people, stanch church-goers that won't examine their beliefs in the light of reason, can't imagine a life without what might be their only right-brain wave activity that they have.

tags: religion, meditation, god, right brain

Religiosity Common Among Mothers Who Kill Children

2005-12-21T23:20:00.000-05:00

Thanks to The Atheologist for having a link to last year's news story. The study was pointing out what is happening, more research is needed to understand why:

"What isn't clear is what's causing what," she said. "Is the church causing people to develop these feelings or are people with these feelings more likely to gravitate toward a fundamentalist church?"

In either case, I can hardly imagine the pain of the mother a she recovers from such a horrific act.

tags: religion, children

When does the soul arrive?

2005-12-20T19:57:00.000-05:00

You know how you get bored some times watching a new movie, because you'd already seen certain parts from the trailer, or recognize a scene as leading up to that part?

I was lucky enough to have never heard about The Island (2005) when we rented it the other night. Ewan McGregor, Scarlett Johansson & Steve Buscemi (the creepy looking guy from Fargo) among others make this a good sci fi film. Great premise, great sets! but lots of gratuitous Hollywood style "death" like in True Lies, meaningless dying that isn't supposed to bother you.

I think an interesting discussion with your favorite theist could be had from the movie, especially after you've read this essay. Don't let the title put you off, Mr. Morgan wrote this and others for another purpose, but I find this piece brilliant for thinking about the concept of a soul.

And for sci-fi fans out there, check out this Alonzo Fyfe piece written last summer.

tags: sci fi, heaven, movies

A difficult question for Mr. Robertson?

2005-12-19T20:37:00.000-05:00

In response to I'm the Mama's post about the latest from Mr. Roberston, let's pose a question to the 700 Club ("Bring It On"):

On the Dec 15 edition of The 700 Club, Mr. Robertson stated that "evolutionists worship atheism", a statement that makes me scratch my head.

Worship means "to honor or reverence as a divine being or supernatural power" and atheism is "a disbelief in the existence of deity", so the image of a worshipping atheist is pretty hilarious.

Could Mr. Robertson state his position without resorting to inflammatory rhetoric about a group he seemingly doesn't understand very well?

Obviously I'm not holding my breath for a response, I'm actually posting this to try out the technorati tag below.

Thanks, Cassandra!

tagged: pat robertson

o'reilly's warriors: any way to give them a clue?

2005-12-19T12:53:00.000-05:00

I was volunteering at a holiday light park recently (a school fundraiser), directing traffic with a battery powered torch. As a group walked past me to get to their cars, they started talking really loudly about how disappointed they were that there was no manger, Jesus and Mary, how disappointing "because that's what Christmas is all about." Pause. I ignore them. So, they kept whining, gnashing teeth and moaning like Jacob Marley's ghost. Whatever. Santa Claus and Rudolph, candy canes and winter scenes were not good enough for them.

A few minutes later, obviously I recognized the obnoxious woman as she leaned out of her car to ask if there was a restaurant nearby. "Yeah, that way," I said, not very excitedly. "Well, is it any good?" "Yeah, it'll be fine for you," I replied. She must have thought I was weird.

It was the best I could manage because I was calculating pros & cons of saying what I was really thinking, "Would you be disappointed if they don't serve you Christian food?"

I didn't say it. I'm a wimp, yup, but I also didn't think that would unlock & release the mean thoughts bill planted in their heads.

Technorati tags: war on christmas

Why are churches tax exempt?

2005-12-18T12:23:00.000-05:00

Why are churches tax exempt again? Every church in my town means no property taxes are paid on that property, which increases the tax rate on everyone else. I financially support institutions that:
1) molest children and don't seem to care
2) sexually mutilate children and defend their 'right' to do so
3) practice mind control & marry off child brides (LDS and FLDS)
4) destroy the environment (fundies)
5) etc etc!

A group called the Christian Law Association has its Top Ten list of why churches should remain exempt. Actually, I don't know about the first issue (the historical reason why churches aren't taxed), but the rest are hysterical, like #2: help people 'make sense of life', for example, by telling people that if they don't do as they say, they are going to burn in hell! Another group at hushmoney.org has a picture of a gagged priest because he can't 'advance the cause of one candidate.' OHHHHHH boy.

During the runoff presidential election (early 2003), there were news articles about churches promoting the God Warrior himself, George W. As far as I can determine, there was no backlash against this. And now recent news articles have been coming out showing how the IRS is going after churches for saying things like 'war is not good.'

This is the kind of country we live in now, and I don't understand how it could have come to this.

Polygamy in theory and practice

2005-12-14T01:44:00.000-05:00

I tend to err on the side of civil liberties, that is, the personal freedom to do as you wish, as long as you aren't hurting others. From this perspective, on the issue of polygamy, I would think, "hey, if everyone was happy, fine." That's theory. Let's look at it in practice.

There is a huge backstory to the recent AP article Woman Sues Fugitive Polygamist Leader that maybe not obvious from that headline. The Mormons, aka the Latter Day Saints famously disassociated themselves with the practice of polygamy about a hundred years ago. The fundamentalist sect, however, practices polygamy like so:

make sure the women aren't educated.
"marry" them off when they are young. Make sure they have lots of kids.
prevent them from talking to non-Mormons and use other methods of mind control.
preach hate about the government (part of mind control again, "you can only trust us") while these child brides are put on welfare as single mothers.
since you only have a small pool to draw from, sons are competition for brides, so kill sons or drive them off.
make sure the local government is corrupt.

These points are quickly summarized from my memory of Jon Krakauer's excellent book Under the Banner of Heaven. According to Krakauer, Warren Jeffs, current leader of the Mormon fundies, is one pretty scary dude. I applaud the woman suing Jeffs, because I'm guessing she has travelled a long, hard road to get to this position.

The Avalanche

2005-12-13T10:51:00.000-05:00

We pick up one year later.

I had spent that year, ever busy, musing on idea that the Christmas Story could never have happened. As the holiday season rolled around again, I found myself back in front of the computer, excited to write my story again, focusing on what Jesus had said that made him special. I had thought of a new angle to the story.

Remember seeing the movie Gandhi when it first came out? I remember the crick in my neck from straining from the second row of the movie theater with my best friend. Anyway, I thought about how Gandhi was a product of his environment. If the British hadn't been exploiting the poorest of poor Indians, would Mahatma Gandhi have had the platform to talk about nonviolent protest? At least in the Hollywood version, he practically single-handedly threw the British out of the country! So my theory was that during Jesus' time, a war or oppression was going on. Off I went in search of his historic context.

I looked and looked and looked. I couldn't find it. I couldn't even find a "just the facts, ma'am" view of history in the Middle East around 1 A.D. What was the relationship between the Jewish people and the Romans? Were there burdensome taxes, oppressed peoples, social inequities, anything? Even the PBS history site called that timeframe "The Beginnings of Christianity" or some such without the details needed to set the stage.

I finally found Earl Doherty's Jesus Puzzle. The Preamble lists the authors who over the past two hundred years have doubted that Jesus ever existed. That rekindled a memory from CCD, being told that some people believe that Jesus never existed, and I remember feeling sorry for them. (By the way, I also remember a time when I felt sorry for people who ate sushi, I couldn't understand why someone would choose to eat raw fish!)

I could go on and on and might in other posts about what I learned once I had Earl Doherty's writing to work from. In a nutshell, he proposes that if one wants to find out about Jesus, your ONLY source is the bible, the problems with using the bible as a reference source, then uses said bible to chase the ghost. He can't find a real person, son of a god or not, in it.

I can't tell you how shocked I was. Incredulous, I researched his theories and read like a maniac.

Jesus was a mythos.

The pebble that fell a year earlier started an avalanche in my mind. I had to go back and reconsider from this new perspective.

Imagine the silence after an avalanche has completed its thundering, the rubble being the framework I had used to understand the world.

Now I feel the cool breeze on my cheek, my eyes are clear and I can see for a hundred miles.

Where I sit now, it might seem a bit lonely, but it's sure peaceful.

Continued a bit more here

Who's got morality?

2005-12-10T21:12:00.000-05:00

When it looked like the Roman Catholic Cardinal Bernard Law in Boston was going to be prosecuted for his part in covering up sexual abuse among his priests, Pope John Paul II gave him a promotion, in effect getting him out of the county. Even though the Catholic Church continues to act as though the sexual abuse problems aren't really a big deal, I'm glad Pat Oliphant doesn't seem to agree.

As far as I can tell, the only change the church has done since the story broke in a big way three years ago is to put in place a review board. It tries to settle cases and has had to close up some churches.

To hurt ANY child is unacceptable, the institutional-wide cover-up and denial despicable.

I'm trying to understand how the church can hang onto its 'moral' hat here. Child abuse isn't prohibited by the Ten Commandments, as an example of a moral code, so does that mean you can allow abuse of children and still be 'moral'?

Bullies affect us all

2005-12-09T21:39:00.000-05:00

One of my favorite books is Barbara Coloroso's book kids are worth it! She also has a book specifically about bullying called the bully, the bullied, and the bystander. I picked it up at the library to learn about the topic, and I'm so glad I did. The bystander that looks away is actually helping the bully achieve their twisted power goals, and any of us could be a bystander at any time. I highly recommend a trip to your library, or buying it and passing it on.

Ms. Coloroso has a handout on her site from the book:
http://www.kidsareworthit.com/images/bully_wkshp.pdf

You never know where you might run into a bully, even a pastor can be one.

so long Judith

2005-12-09T21:05:00.000-05:00

I used to read thehappyheretic.com every month or so for a few years. I love Judith Hayes' writing, it really clarifies what it means to be atheist, and she has a humorous writing style. I had happened to come across her site around the time I was "researching" my Christmas story by typing 'happy' into Google. Unfortunately, Ms. Hayes has taken down her site earlier this year. It's too bad, because I use to go back and re-read old articles of hers, it was like pulling on an old comfy sweater. I'm going to miss having her around!

Lippy kids don't deserve respect?

2005-12-08T17:28:00.000-05:00

One thing important to me as a mother is giving my children an environment where thinking is permitted. I value free thought and free expression.

My children can say whatever they want to me, safely. By safe, I mean they do not need to fear a punishment.

If I am told, "you are mean, you big ninny!" then I say, "you have some strong feelings!"

They are, after all, only feelings.

I can't control another person's feelings. I can't even control my feelings! All I can control is my reaction to my feelings.

I don't feel my self worth is on the line with a taunt like above, so I don't feel the impulse to make someone 'pay' for their thoughts or feelings.

If I can stand back and recognize what is driving those strong emotions, I can try to get that root cause. After the strong emotions have run their course, I can talk about a better way to communicate than calling names.

I'm not perfect but when I realize that, I fix it. I apologize. I try again.

I've been reading commentary on the TV show "Wife Swap", an episode where a Christian and an Atheist household switches mothers. From a commentary on the atheist family's web site comes this description. [infidelguy.com]

Sounds like the show used some editing tricks, but this part of the commentary struck me. 'Jeff' is the Rev. Jeff Stonerock, see him here: http://www.victoryworldoutreach.org/images/pastor_jeff.gif

Jeff explains that one of his 6 kids actually "got a little lippy" with him, then laughs about how he washed the kid's mouth out with soap. He laughs more about how the kid kept saying "I don't care, I don't care, I don't care" while Poppa Jeff amped up the mouth soap punishment "worse and worse and worse" until the kid couldn't take it anymore and gave in.

I couldn't confirm anywhere else that he said this, but I did find on the ABC site his wife describing the soap punishment.

Based on this description:

Would you feel safe in speaking your mind in Jeff's house? Or do you think he treats non-family better than his children? (i.e., do you think if you got 'lippy' with him he would treat you that way, too?)

Would you want someone to do this to you? If not, is it OK to do it to someone else? What if they are younger than you, like a child?

What does Jeff think he is teaching his children?

What do you think about Jeff's congregation? What do you think Jeff preaches to them about? Would you take your child to his church?

Corporate Interests Dumbing Down Elementary Students

2005-12-06T12:18:00.000-05:00

I just heard a disturbing story from a friend. Her fifth grade daughter in public school is really upset by a PowerPoint presentation due soon.

I'm guessing that my job choice of software engineering has meant more hours than the average person banging my head trying to get the *#&%!! computer to do what it is supposed to, I mean, what I want it to do. But this happened much later than childhood for me.

When I look back to fifth grade, I think of playing dominoes and Spades. I remember building tent cities and swimming and riding my bike really fast down the street. This poor girl is going to remember hours spent frustrated by PowerPoint. What a waste!

I want my children to be creative, caring, responsible, rational & intelligent. I want them to be good communicators and problem solvers, courageous enough to speak their minds, and well grounded. None of these goals would be furthered by learning how to manipulate PowerPoint.

For anyone interested in computers and childhood, here is an excellent report from a group called the Alliance for Childhood:
http://allianceforchildhood.net/projects/computers/computers_reports_fools_gold_download.htm

The Pebble

2005-12-04T22:05:00.000-05:00

Ooh, she was a snot, that little girl, a real Veruca Salt. "Christmas is to celebrate the birth of baby Jesus" a busy body informed me. "Oh," I replied, thinking of the Little Golden Book that we had growing up with the pictures of the manger and Mary. That book was long gone, and I knew I wouldn't be replacing it. No problem, I thought, I'll research it and I'll write a version of the Christmas story. We can read it every year; it'll become a family tradition. You have to understand, with a preschooler around, I was trying to look ahead.

Now, how does the Christmas story go? I think they were in Bethlehem. Was that in Nazareth, like Nazareth County, or was Nazareth another town? I never had a clear sense of it from growing up, so, here's my chance!

First off, thank goodness for Religious Tolerance.org. The first sentence on that site at the time said "This is a large religious web site which promotes religious freedom, tolerance and diversity as positive cultural values." It's a great resource for research no matter what you believe, putting aside the 'positive cultural values' part.

What comes to mind when you think of Christianity? Jesus in robes, and Christmas. Maybe Easter, too. So why hadn't this story been fixed in my mind?

Well, go check out: http://www.religioustolerance.org/xmas_lib.htm

It is the opinion of the essayist that the Christmas story as described in the two Scriptures of Matthew and Luke could never have happened.

I was so shocked to read this. Shocked! I did more research, found I agreed with it, and let the implications settle in.

Brought up Catholic, I had stopped going to church once I was allowed to stop. I was pretty sure there was neither god nor heaven, and bold enough not to baptize my daughter. But yet I hadn't taken a critical look at that old belief system. Kids do wonderful things for you, they make you grow in improbable ways.

Well, to finish, at that time I thought I could salvage my Christmas Story. From my notes:

"Although the story of Jesus' birth has been lost, we still celebrate his birth because of some of the things he said at that time that were pretty radical, like 'treat others the way you want them to treat you' [next year, find more things he said]"

A few days later, I broke the third metacarpal in my hand, so I put it away. When I finally got back to it, an even larger surprise awaited me.

Continued here

minor edits (spelling, add link) 12jan2006

tags: religious deconversion, christmas story, religion

welcome!

2005-12-02T21:48:00.000-05:00

A family member told me that in her opinion, mother's voices aren't heard in our culture. As the mom of a young family, I have a theory as to why this is so.

I can tell you that before having children, I was able to concentrate for hours at a time. Hours! The luxury of that now seems so far away. When my little one toddles up with Moo, Baa, La La La! clutched in a chubby fist, I cannot just turn away, which means I am interrupted approximately every three minutes. Same with nighttime. I used to sleep, usually all night! And I could sleep in on the weekend if I wanted to! Even when no one is offering to "help" pound the keyboard, the daily work of a mother does not do wonders for turning thoughts into prose.

But even with my time constraints, I feel I can't keep quiet.

So if my writing is a bit uneven, quickly composed and absent a final polish, you, dear reader, have an inkling why.

This blog is my feeble attempt to shine a light on the scary as I see it. Hope you enjoy.